I Didn’t Want to be a Boy Mom-Part 1

My oldest son just turned 12.  He wasn’t just the one who made me a mom, he was also the first to make me a Mom of Boys or #MOB. 

When my oldest was born I was fine with the idea that I was having a boy.  In the perfect birth order I had imagined for any future kids I would have, my first was a boy.  The second would be a girl.  Then we would see if there would even be a third. 

We were living in Mexico when I found out we were expecting a baby.  It’s always a new experience for any first time mom.  To make things extra interesting we had to borrow money to buy a pregnancy test.  Then the whole stick got saturated with urine so it was ruined-it is best practice to pee into a cup and then put the stick in…just saying.

Eventually it was time to go to the doctor for the magical ultrasound.  You know the one, where they tell you if there are three legs or just two 🙂 

My hubby was holding my hand and I felt him squeeze it as the doctor told me he had found a penis.  What?!?  My husband was so excited that his first born would be a son.  And I was happily naive of the world I would soon enter. 

It was okay.  Our first born would be a son and then we would have a second baby- a daughter.

I had no idea in that moment that I was being thrown into a world where I would have to make decisions about things like circumcision. 

I would have to learn to clean a diaper so that I wouldn’t get squirted when my precious little baby peed without a diaper on.  Peepee Teepees are a cute idea but not actually practical, a washcloth is much better so you can just throw it on top like a rain tarp.

Me and my first son Josue
Josue 2 years old, wearing snow boots and a diaper 🙂

During my second pregnancy, I was mentally prepared for a girl.  It would follow the pattern in our families. Both my husband and I come from families where the first born is a son and the second born is a daughter.

When the doctor found a penis once again on the ultrasound I was in shock. Why would God give me a second son? What do I know about raising boys?

I would go back and forth between the practical benefits of having two boys- like the benefit of hand me downs, and similiar likes in toys, cartoons etc.

Then I would doubt my capabilities of raising two sons. How would I connect with boys? God was so patient with me.

God began to show me a purpose in giving me two sons. Now don’t misunderstand me, I believe with all my heart that God gives us the kids that we are made to parent. I believe that raising girls is just as important as raising boys, but this is how God helped me embrace my role as a Mom of Boys.

God showed me that this world is in great need of little boys who will grow into strong men. Men who can be leaders with good morals. Men who will love on their wives. Men who will be present with their own kids.

I began to understand that my role as a #BoyMom was bigger than I could imagine.  I had an important job to do.  God entrusted me with sons who will someday grow into men.

This new realization was a game changer for me. By 2012, I was a mom to two little boys. My house had been over taken with Hot Wheels and Dinosaurs.

Josue holding his baby brother Josiah
These two are too cute

Even better, my heart was being overtaken by the best little hugs ever- hugs of a little boy who thinks his mom is his world. My arms were full as I breastfed my second son and enjoyed his contagious little smile.

Josiah-So smily even with his helmet on

After having two sons, I was learning that raising boys was a unique responsibility. I was learning that boys are physical and loud and yet wonderful. I was smitten with their tender hearts hidden deep below farting sounds and stinky feet.

I was finally in a place where I was thankful to be a mom of two healthy and happy boys!

Our family of 4…..Little did I Know there would be another one

Choosing My Family Instead of Social Media

Last week I was going strong on my social media sites. I was excited about getting this new blog up and started. I was sharing my FACEBOOK page with my friends and inviting them to follow it. I was posting stories on Instagram and learning how to interact with my followers.

Suddenly it was Thursday. I found myself sitting on the couch in the living room with my cellphone in my hand. I was scrolling everywhere I could and supposedly watching a movie with my three kids and my husband.

I was being “efficient” and trying to get things done while we were spending supposed quality time as a family. Suddenly I felt a little hand take my phone away. My first response was to get upset. “No! You can’t play that dino game that you always ask for!”

Then time suddenly froze. My 2 year old, put my phone off to the side and put my hand in his. My heart melted. My child didn’t want to play with my phone, he wanted to hold Mommies’ hand while he watched the movie.

I can’t remember what we were watching, I only remember the desire I saw in my little boy’s face to be with his Mommy. That look sent my heart into a tail spin.

I knew in that moment that as I start out on this journey of blogging and learning social media I need to set boundaries. I do not want my family to suffer so that my number of followers will soar.

I will always choose him!

Once I read an article from Focus on the Family that talked about how to connect more with your kids in a world focused on technology. I thought about this article as I sat there beside my son.

The article talked about how many kids say they can’t open up to their parents because the parents are too busy and they are always on their phones.

This is not the reality I want in my family. I want my boys to know and feel that they are more important than anything that could be on a screen.

It was hard for me to not post pics this weekend of our Quarantine Easter. I may still post some but I made a decision last week to enjoy the moments with my family without always having a camera in my hand.

I will need to make a schedule and routine of when to write blogs and to post on Instagram so that I can keep things under control.

I know that just like any hobby or business there will be busier seasons. There will be times where I invest my time to work ahead and schedule posts so that I can be ready.

I will still invest in this dream that God has placed on my heart. This dream of encouraging other moms in this epic journey of raising boys.

What are you doing in your family to keep healthy boundaries with electronics and screen time?!?